I’ve noticed in myself, and others, that one of the most painful places to be is “knowing” what you want to do but not actually doing it.
You know that you want to do what is right for you but you keep people-pleasing.
You know you want to put yourself out there more but you keep hiding your creative genius.
You know you want to be brave and bold but you keep letting your fears win.
And, the most painful of all…
You know you want to surrender to the callings of your soul but you keep settling for the status quo.
If this is you, as a…
Generator or Mani-Gen, you probably feel incredibly frustrated with yourself and mad that you can’t actually make the leap.
Projector, maybe you feel bitter and confused about how you can help others make these kinds of changes but can’t seem to do it for yourself.
Manifestor, I imagine there might be some anger at yourself because being in your own way diminishes your impact.
Reflector, you likely feel disappointed in yourself and how this reflects on your community.
As a projector, the knowing vs doing has haunted me for as long as I can remember. I have helped others embody their knowing for my whole life – literally thousands upon thousands of people. But when it came to myself, it seems like same shit different day for way too long.
And I have discovered that there are a few simple steps to go from knowing to doing.
#1. Notice where you are experiencing your not-self theme.
Gen and Mani Gen’s not-self theme is frustration.
Projector not-self theme is bitterness.
Manifestor not-self theme is anger.
Reflector not-self theme is disappointment.
And these are pristine clues that your soul is begging you to get out of your own way and choose yourself. They are showing you that your decisions don’t match who you came here to be on the deepest level.
FEEL those feelings in your body. Process them. TRUST that they have great wisdom to show you about HOW to actually make the leap.
#2. Decide to make soul-aligned decisions EVEN when you are scared.
There is a common misconception that when you live in alignment with your soul that you won’t be afraid. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
As someone with a heavily defined spleen (and splenic authority), what I know FOR SURE is that living a soul aligned life is actually the scariest of all to do because of how conditioned we are to people please, be logical, and “make sure” things will turn out.
But what most people don’t understand is that fear is JUST a signal to tune into your intuition and assess the actual risks. This is true even if your spleen is undefined or open.
So, it isn’t that you “should always” plow through fear. It’s actually the opposite because sometimes when you tune in, there are life-threatening risks that aren’t going to be worth taking.
But, for the most part, fear is a conditioned response in the nervous system for anything new and unknown, the kind it takes trust, courage, and confidence to walk through.
And that is the kind of fear you want to face as you make soul-aligned decisions. You acknowledge the fear and move forward anyway.
#3. Learn about and experiment with your Human Design Authority.
Your Human Design authority is the voice of your soul and it speaks through your body.
Sacral authority speaks through guttural sounds of uh-huh, uh-uh, and hmmm.
Emotional authority speaks through moments of clarity after the emotional wave.
Splenic authority speaks through the body’s instincts and NO.
Ego authority speaks through the desires of the “higher heart.”
Self-projected authority speaks through the tone of voice.
Mental authority speaks through the environment and bounces itself off of soundboards and lands in your ears.
Lunar authority speaks through the cycles of the moon and the cycles of energy you have each day.
I do a deep dive into your authority in the Human Design Map.
#4. EXPECT all your drama to come up
The moment you start to notice what your inner authority is telling you and how that contrasts with what your mind is telling you, your inner drama king or queen is going to start throwing a fucking tantrum.
Nothing has gone wrong.
Right now, your brain and nervous system are conditioned to use logic, people-pleasing, and the quest for certainty for making decisions.
And thinking that it should be any other way is the real problem.
Believing that you are doing it wrong because it doesn’t feel like unicorns skipping through poppy fields is a recipe for MORE frustration, bitterness, anger, and disappointment.
When you expect your shit to come up, though, then you are in the drivers seat. You take your power back.
Because the truth is that your brain is like plastic. You can re-wire that automatic freak-out pattern by making new choices. Even teeny tiny ones.
Like I tell my clients all the time, we don’t want to be blowing out our nervous system. We want to be playing at the edge.
#5. Play at your edge.
At the end of the day, your shit coming up is not a problem if completely trust yourself, have the confidence necessary to move forward, and know how to play at your edge.
And while you can’t just skip to the part where you are making soul-aligned decisions you can expand your capacity to BE THE PERSON that makes aligned decisions.
You do that by understanding how deconditioning works.
I walk you through it, literally step-by-step, in the deconditioning toolbox that comes with the Human Design Map.
But, in essence, it’s this:
#1. Be intentional with make one small change at a time.
#2. Pause instead of acting out of old patterns.
#3. Process the emotions that come up with you don’t act on old patterns.
#4. Figure out what those emotions are telling you about your path forward.
#5. Find the “true block” (aka the shadow that is preventing forward movement).
#6. Clear the “block” by embracing the shadow.
#7. identify other places where this shadow may be blocking you and reclaim the ENERGY of the shadow to use when needed.
#8. Choose alignment on purpose with the reclaimed energy.
#9. Celebrate and RECEIVE the fruits of your inner evolution.
#10. Rinse and repeat as you set bigger and bigger intentions.
The more you notice where you are in the “not-self”, decide to live an aligned life, work with your HD authority, embrace the shit that comes up, and play at your edge, you will become more and more “aligned” with your souls deepest desires for this lifetime.
That math always adds up. It can only work out that way. It works every time.
You’ve got this.
p.s. Want me to walk you through your soul-aligned decision making authority and all of the deconditioning steps? You got it. Order your Human Design Map for everything you need.